How Is Self-Esteem Affected By Appearances?
Read this post to learn more about how self-esteem is affected by body image and appearance.
You’ve heard the phrase “Appearances can be deceiving,” right? Not only is that true, but it can also significantly influence your self-esteem. Self-esteem is linked to self-confidence, formed by how the outside world sees us.
This does not mean that the way you feel is dictated by what people think of you, but it does make a difference on some level.
So, today, I will discuss how your appearance can affect your self-esteem.
What is Self-Esteem, And How Does It Develop?
Self-esteem is the value and worth we subjectively evaluate ourselves on. Given this definition, we can easily say that the part of ourselves that we assess the hardest is our body image.
It is linked with how we perceive the world and think it perceives us. This means that every little thing we do to boost our self-esteem and roles depends on different situations in life.
It’s important to remember that people are not born with any gained self-esteem. Instead, it develops with time due to our upbringing and social contacts.
A thing that can affect our body image and self-esteem is being raised in an abusive environment, physically or mentally, or being born with a distinct disfigurement or some visible difference from others.
The Early Years
If a person is subjected to different types of public or domestic psychological or physical assault, it most probably will affect one’s self-esteem.
Even small things, like a kid in preschool or kindergarten making fun of another, can cause doubt in a young mind. Our surroundings and the opinion of our social circle, even if we don’t get bothered by it, play a massive role in establishing healthy confidence in us.
If a person starts to acknowledge a flaw in your appearance, you will likely begin questioning your appearance. That’s how we are built, and even if we sometimes say we don’t care about what people think of us, we still soak in that remark.
If we give in to the idea that society and people shape our feelings about ourselves, we will have a harder time accepting who we are and what we look like healthily.
On the other hand, if we listened to family and friends who wanted to help us when doubt was only forming, there is a pretty big chance we would know how to handle this kind of dismissive behavior better.
What Your Appearance Says About You
How we perceive ourselves is how we want the world to see us. It’s as simple as that. We go the extra mile to have a more pleasant effect when we look at ourselves in the mirror most of the time.
But in reality, the thing that matters most for building steady self-esteem is accepting that we are what we are and are perfect like this. Of course, it’s easier said than done, but it’s a simple philosophy to live your life without the stress and pressure of social evaluation.
Things like comparing yourself to other people or not quite seeing your good sides can and should be dealt with. Recognizing your qualities, talents, and abilities is how to build a stronger relationship with yourself and create stable self-esteem and self-confidence.
Why Is It Important To Build Self-Esteem?
You feel secure and worthy when you value yourself and have high self-esteem. These two emotions are often associated with having a high level of self-care and love, contributing to these emotions.
When you have high self-esteem, you’re confident in communicating for yourself and building positive relationships. Some of the attributes of someone with high self-esteem include
- Having assertive communication skills
- Confident decision-making abilities
- Can cultivate positive relationships — and less likely to stay in unhealthy ones
- Has realistic self-expectations
Building your self-esteem is easier said than done, especially if you’re recovering from mental health illnesses or traumatic events. But remember that the only person who can make you feel or look good is yourself—no one else.
What are your thoughts on this? Let me know in the comments.
A great post.
I spent years doubting myself and now I completely accept myself. I don’t allow negative thoughts to creep in, about appearance or any other subject. I’ve realised life is too short.
Hi, thanks for reading. I also spent a long time doubting myself. I love how you’ve reframed your mindset via positive thinking.
Informative post. Comparing yourself to others brings nothing but heartache
Agreed
Thank you so much for writing about this. It makes so much sense as you’ve explained it. Lots to think about.
Thanks for reading Laura.
Great post and I agree both go hand in hand. I always feel so much better and a bit more confident when I put on a little bit of makeup or when my hair looks good and the opposite can be said if I feel like my face is a little too broken out or my clothes don’t fit exactly how I’d like. It can be a struggle! But I am doing my best 🙂
Doing your best is the only thing that matters the most!
This post was really insightful and my self-esteem and my confidence is something I am working on. I struggle at the moment because of Fibromyalgia I haven’t been in the gym and moving as much, so I am learning to do things differently. Thank you for sharing this post.
Lauren – http://www.bournemouthgirl.com
Thank you for sharing your struggles Lauren. I hope things get better for you.
Great tips, I’m working on building right now. We need to accept ourselves the way we are. Thank you for sharing!
Hi Fransic,
Yes! We should all learn to love and accept ourselves.
Great post! appearance affects self-esteem greatly and I always refrain from talking about the looks because for me it is marked as a ‘sensitive moment’ for any person. I do think the only possible way to comment on someone else’s look (and it’s only in case you can’t help it) but to say something like “you look great”
Lyosha,
Unless I am asked for my opinion, I try to refrain from making comments.
I can definitely see how self-esteem is affected by appearance. But I have found as I get older, I just don’t care what other people think. There are two opinions I care about besides my own, and that works great. But it isn’t easy to get there either. I spent far too many years worrying about what others thought, or listening to their negative comments.
Hi Erica,
I agree that as I got older I stopped caring about the opinions of others. Mainly because I learned how to be confident in my own skin. But, so many women go years with low self-esteem due toour looks.
Confident decision making. What an important quality. I strive to be better at making decisions without second guessing.
I love to hear this Fern!
You know I never really had self esteem issues, until I encountered Congestive Heart Failure. My stomach looks like I’m a few months pregnant. I was so self consciousness about my stomach I wouldn’t take pictures from my chest down. But I had to remind myself that people don’t know why my belly is big, and that it’s a part of my big beautiful self. I had to learn that the only opinion that mattered was mine. Thank you for sharing!!
Valarie, Thanks for sharing this with me. A lot of times we get so caught up in our own heads that we forget to ask ourselves, “who cares?”
Letting go of our fears about what others might be thinking of us is a struggle. The older I get, the less I care what others think, but it’s still there in the background. When it comes up, I try to recognize it and then let it go.
Hi,
I struggled a lot with ignoring people when I was younger. Nowadays, I’ve learned how to walk away from people or anything that does not make me feel good.